Friday, March 04, 2005


We are now at Vanderbilt children's. It was weird about how the transport team was going on about how they have all the equipment in the ambulance that is in the NICU and if something were to happen, they would be able to help him.

I don't completely understand, it's just a narrow spot, not like the blood isn't getting there, it's just making his heart work a little harder.

I am extremely thankful for the nurse I had, she called Dr. Barnett and got him to release me so that I could go with Benji to VCH. She was very understanding and got us loaded up and on our way very quickly. We got over to the hospital about the same time Benji did but then we had to wait for them to transfer him into NICU and make sure he was stable.

We have called many different people and couldn't get ahold of anybody. Tom and Nancy Crow from church got our message and came up to the hospital, so did Aunt Wanda. It was so odd, people we can usually just think about and there they are, and tonight when we needed somebody we went hours with nothing.

The feeling of nothingness was unbearable. We felt as if our world was falling apart and we had nobody with us to hold our hands. The heart defects were so completely unexpected we were not prepared at all. It was a blessing that the Crow's gave up their evening to sit with us that first night at Vanderbilt. We did not know how long we would be there.

Thursday, March 03, 2005


The cardiologist saw Benji. My first impression of her is I don't like her. She was so blunt and didn't think about how we would feel. Benji has something wrong with his heart. He has a coarctation of his aorta and his aortic valve is bicuspid it is also thick. They have put him on PGE(?) it will force his PDA to stay open so his body gets blood. They are tranfering him to Vanderbilt Children's Hospital now.

I am scared, I tried to tell everybody something was going on and they said I was wrong. Now this? He did nurse this afternoon. I was starting to relax until the cardiologist came in here. Now my world feels like it is shattering.

My cousin Madeline was born with heart defects and had surgery and it was repaired and she's fine. She's 18 now. She has Turner's Syndrome but she is doing fine. I think she is even going away to college.

God, please protect my little boy.

More Concerned

Well.. Benji wasn't interested in nursing at all last night. So far he's not interested this morning either. The peds nurse said he had some formula last night.

Dr. Brad Greenbaum checked Benji out this morning, said he looks good just that he has a heart murmur and wants cardiology to look at it since we live a good 45 minutes away. He says it is common for babies to have a murmur when they are born and it close up in a few hours/days.

Benji is still lethargic.

I am trusting in God that Benji is taken care of, but I have a feeling of dread. Daddy wasn't here when Dr. Brad talked to your mommy and it's unsettling. I don't know if I am being paranoid or if there is really something wrong.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

He's Here

Benji was born at 3:44pm. 8lbs 13 1/2 ozs.

It was funny now that you are born... about 3pm the nurse checked your mommy to see how we were progressing. Mommy was dilated to 4-5 at that time. She told daddy and Aunt Christina it would easily be another hour. So they went down to get some coffee..

Right before they left mommy had a hard contraction that didn't really feel too good. Since we had gotten the epidural about 2pm they told the nurse on their way out. So I have another one of these contractions and they upped the medication in the epidural. Just on a whim the nurse decides to check mommy again.

Fully dilated at 10 and 100% effaced Wow that was fast. It was 3:18pm and you wanted to see the world. The nurse told mommy not to push and called the doctor and daddy. It was about 3:30p when daddy and Aunt Christina got back to the room. It was really hard because you wanted to come.

Dr. Barnett was a few minutes later. Then you were born at 3:44pm

I am a bit concerned though... your skin is a little blueish and they said you are cold. You are sleepy too.. but that might be because they had to give mommy newbane(sp?) to relax for the epidural. Your APGAR scores were 8 and then 9.

Benji's Birthday

We just made it to the hospital and have gotten checked in. WE can't wait until this afternoon when little Benji will be born. Dr. Barnett thinks he will be at least 9 pounds if not 10. He is basing that on how big Micah and the girls were. Micah was 11lbs 3oz. I am so glad today has finally come.